How to Hold On When You Feel Like Giving Up

Do you…In_Pain

  • Ever feel like giving up?
  • Ever feel like quitting?
  • Ever feel like your situation is so hopeless that the only thing you can possibly do is leave? Just walk away, head out the door and never come back?

Jeremiah 32:17 – (NIV) says this…

“Ah, Sovereign LORD, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you.

In extreme circumstances, people can feel so much emotional pain that they take their own lives. Perhaps you’ve even considered that yourself. But the real reason people commit suicide isn’t the pain. It’s the loss of hope. It’s the sense that there’s no escape, no way to resolve their problems. It’s the conviction that things are never going to get better. They look and look for a ray of hope and only see darkness. That’s how Job felt…

“Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for, that God would be willing to crush me, to let loose his hand and cut me off! . . . . “What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? Do I have the strength of stone? Is my flesh bronze? Do I have any power to help myself, now that success has been driven from me?”

“My body is clothed with worms and scabs, my skin is broken and festering. My days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle, and they come to an end without hope. Remember, O God, that my life is but a breath; my eyes will never see happiness again.”Job 6:8-12; 7:5-7 (NIV)

Job knew what it was to feel despair; to lose hope; to look into the future and see only darkness. He felt as though even death would be preferable to what he was experiencing.

What relevance does Job’s struggle have to us? Why should we care how he felt when God took away everything he cared about – his family, his wealth, his reputation, his health? Because the temptation to give up, to lose hope, to despair, is universal:

  • It’s the wife who is ready to give up on her husband and her marriage; rather than stay and keep trying to make it better.
  • It’s the parents who are ready to give up trying to guide their rebellious teenage son.
  • It’s the grown daughter who has tried over and over again to please her parents, without success, and is about ready to completely write off the relationship.
  • It’s the pregnant teenager who can’t see any way out but to have an abortion.
  • It’s the fed-up employee who wants to honor God with his work but is about [this] far from telling off the boss and walking out the door.
  • It’s the victim of cancer who’s tired of fighting the illness and thinking of taking her own life.

The common denominator is a feeling that the situation is hopeless, that things aren’t going to get better. And when that happens, the temptation is to give up. Sometimes giving up takes the dramatic form of a suicide, a divorce, a worker who takes a gun to work with deadly results. But more often it takes the form of what Thoreau called, “quiet desperation.” People going through the motions of a marriage or job; people maintaining the pretense of a relationship with their children or their parents, but who have in reality given up. Detached emotionally. Stopped working; stopped fighting; stopped caring.

All of us have faced this temptation, when it seems pointless to keep trying. Some of you are probably facing it now. You may be hiding it well; so that the rest of us would never suspect the struggle that’s taking place in your heart. But there’s an area of your life where you’re considering just giving up and walking away, regardless of what God says or the Bible says.

And the question for us as Christians is, How do we keep holding on when we feel like giving up? How do we find the strength to persevere, to go on? Where does the power come from to keep on keeping on? This morning I’m going to give you three key principles to store in your heart for that day when you’re tempted just to throw in the towel and give up.

Trust in God’s Sovereignty

First, God is sovereign. He is in control. No matter how hopeless, painful, unpleasant, or discouraging your circumstances are, He has a purpose for them. He has a purpose for you in the midst of them. And that purpose does not involve giving up. It does not involved despair. It does not involve abandoning your faith. It does not involve panicking. The struggle you are going through has meaning and purpose, because God is sovereign and He does everything for a reason. He doesn’t make mistakes. He isn’t surprised by what has happened to you.

Let me put this another way. You are where you are right now because that’s where God wants you right now. Your circumstances are part of His plan for your life. This is not an accident. It’s not an unhappy coincidence. It’s not bad luck. It’s not bad karma. It’s not just the result of your decisions or your husband’s decisions or your parents’ decisions or your bosses’ decisions or any other human being’s decisions. It’s the result of a loving and wise God working in your life to accomplish His good purposes, even when those purposes don’t seem loving or good to us.

“Then Job replied to the LORD:

“I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted . . . . Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.”Job 42:1-3    (NIV)

What does that mean? It means that for the Christian, despair is not an option. Despair is for people who live in a random, capricious universe where bad things just happen for no reason. Despair is for people who live at the mercy of cosmic forces that are at best indifferent to them and at worst malevolent. Despair is for people who live in a universe in which there is no God, or in which God is only a spectator. Despair is for people who live in a world that doesn’t make sense, where no one and nothing is in control. Despair is not for Christians, who live under the constant care of a loving Father.

Let’s get specific. Perhaps one of your family members is a jerk; maybe even a non-Christian jerk. They let you down. They don’t show you love you the way you long to be loved. They are selfish, insensitive, and lazy.  They are disappointment on many levels. Will they change? I don’t know. But I do know this: whether or not they change, God has a purpose for you in that relationship. It’s a good purpose. It’s a wise purpose. It’s a purpose that honors God. It’s a purpose that can bring you joy if you will trust in God and follow Him, even if your circumstances don’t change; even if that family member stays a jerk.

“For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.” – 1 Peter 3:5-6  (NIV)

Why did these women submit to their husbands? Because they trusted in their husbands? No, because they trusted in God. When you are tempted to give up, remember that God is in control, and He is loving and wise and good. He has not abandoned you; He has not stopped caring about you.

Trust in God’s Power

We become hopeless when we can see no escape from our situation. We despair when it seems impossible that our circumstances will change for the better. But if God desires to do so, He can make a way.  As Job stated… “I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted”.

Ah, Sovereign LORD, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you.”Jeremiah 32:17 (NIV)

  • “Yes, but you don’t know my husband. He’ll never change.” – Nothing is too hard forGod
  • “Yes, but you don’t know my boss.” – Nothing is too hard forGod
  • “Yes, but you don’t know my situation” – Nothing is too hard forGod

God specializes in resurrections. He can bring life to dead relationships. He is the Creator; He can cause loving feelings and attitudes to be created out of nothing. He can transform people and situations in ways that we are unable to foresee. He can do it. If your situation seems hopeless, if it seems that nothing short of a miracle can save you, then you are in luck. God is able to do whatever it takes to fulfill His plan for you.

Place Your Hope in Christ. But whether or not God chooses to change our circumstances, ultimately our hope is not in what he is going to do for us on this earth, in this life. Our true hope is in Jesus Christ. Our true hope is in the forgiveness of sins and eternal life that come from faith in Christ. [That puts everything into perspective].

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade–kept in heaven for you.”1 Peter 1:3-4  (NIV)

What is the result of placing our trust in God? Hope,  joy, and peace.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”Romans 15:13 (NIV)

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God’s Own Presence

Written by James A. Frost

James A. Frost“Oh how good and grand it surely must be,”
Said the lowly bush when it was
looking up at the tree.
“To stand so tall and give shade
to every passer-by,”
“With birds nesting in its branches,
chirping their nightly lullaby,”
“In such regal splendor lifting
its leafy arms in prayer,”
“oh the times I have wished I
could be up there.”
A little hummingbird who happened
to be near by,
Sought to comfort the little bush
when he heard it cry,
Saying “God made each of us so
different in His wise way,”
“I can’t soar like the eagle, but
so many flowers fill me and my day.”
“So much loveliness surrounds us
we should never complain.”
“Whenever you are thirsty He also
sends you the comfort of His
life giving rain.”

View original writing

The serpent in the Garden of Eden tempted Eve with the forbidden fruit.  At first, she reminded him of what God had said: “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” (Genesis 3:2-3).  However, in Genesis 3:6 we read “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.”  The original sin began with covetousness.  Eve looked, she desired, she took what was not hers to take.

The Ten Commandments forbids coveting in Exodus 20:17, “Thou shalt not covet…”   Most people today do not think for a moment they are covetous.  Yet, covetousness is without a doubt one of the biggest sins facing America and the western world.  We rail against pornography, sexual impurity, abortion and other “bigger” sins, but we so easily overlook the root sin: the love of things and pleasure.  In Colossians 3:5, the Bible calls such covetousness idolatry.

In 2 Peter 2:14-15 we get a clearer picture of the seriousness of covetousness.  The solution to the sin of covetousness is found in Hebrews 13:5 which says “Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Are you content with what God has given you? Are you more like the little bush in the poem above or the tiny hummingbird?

~Samuel Lawrence~

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Such Love

Written by James A. Frost

James A. FrostConstantly He is giving whispers of
His eternal love to me.
In the quietness Thou dost fill the
seeking heart that comes to Thee.
The full orbed radience of His presence
bursts upon my mind,
Never to come away empty, in this
beautiful fellowship I find.
It is in this stillness that the heart
is lifted to summits before unknown.
I am within the veil, in holy awe,
bowing at the throne,
Where only the deepest longings
find answers that make sense,
Knowing that we could never be so
filled, by all other inferior presence.
So much Sorrow and grief we bring to
Him, by doubting His love,
A “love the covereth all” and will one
day take us to be with Him above.

View original writing

In Hebrews 4:14-16 we see Jesus Christ as our “Great High Priest”…

“Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

Mr. Frost understood the power in daily communion with Jesus Christ.  Do you have the confidence to come boldly to Christ with all your needs? Trust him today.

~Samuel Lawrence~

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Religious Liberty Threat “Under the Radar”

Defending Religious Liberty and Parents’ Rights

“The Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA)–a bill which clearly places Christian beliefs on the wrong side of the law–is expected to be voted on this fall. ENDA is a threat to the rights of Christians and would grant special workplace protections to people based on sexual orientation. As a result, Christian business owners could be faced with choosing between their religious beliefs and violating a federal law. ENDA would also prevent religious employers from making hiring and employment decisions based on their moral convictions.” -Tom Minnery, Senior Vice President, Government & Public Policy at Focus On the Family.

Learn more about ENDA by watching this week’s Focus Update video…

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Happiness

Written by James A. Frost

James A. FrostLooking back on the many times,
when on God my troubles I tried to blame,
Now I can only retrace my steps in tears of shame.
He has so patiently, and gently taught me
to trust and exercise belief,
To walk on shifting sands and to
find His placed firmness for my feet beneath.
Now my life is beautifully filled with
believing every day.
The happiness it brings…, I have no desire
to live any other way.
Oh the utter joy we can experience
When our souls are given wholly to our Lord.
To become a harp in His hands is
to know the sweetest chords.
Never doubting the finality of your
consecration, knowing you walk on Holy ground,
singing because you’re  happy in this
unequalled love you found.

View original writing

Read John 10:10.

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God’s Presence

James A. Frost

Written by James A. Frost

In the stillness He sends mystic notes, and answers for my mind,
Times pregnant with meaning, in solitude that I find.
Thoughts sweeping like breakers gently rolling in the early hour sea,
And His love bursts like a glorious sunrise upon me.
In this hush I feel the brush of eternity,
Caught up in the radiance, unmindful of what else is happening there.
I knelt in reverence to this God given moment, in Holy prayer.
He fills my nostrils with celestial perfume, I feel His hand.
My heart’s finger traced the rainbow that was there,
In the times I did not understand.
The surrounding air glistening, and the rustle of Angel wings,
He will always be close in my every tomorrow, no matter what it brings.

View original writing

Today’s poem by Mr. Frost brings to mind quiet times of prayer and Bible Study, sometimes early in the morning or late at night, or in prayer driving to and from work.  So often, we want some grand demonstration of God’s power or mighty answer to our prayers.  We live in a nation gripped by sensationalism, of tinsel, and American idols.  That seeking of the “the sensational” often spills over into our worship, whether at home in solitude or in worship time in our congregations.  Every believer, I think, wants to have those grand “mountain top” experiences. I have had them, and so have many of you.

However, we see in the Old Testament, the Lord revealing himself to one of his great prophets in quite a different way in 1 Kings 19:11-18.  The Lord told Elijah “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.”  The purpose was to reveal Himself to Elijah.  Notice how   “the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; 12 and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire… a still small voice.

How many times have we missed the Lord’s answer to our prayers or His revelation of Himself to each one of us because we were not listening for a whisper from the Lord, but looking instead for some heavenly fireworks display?  Reflect on today’s poem and  take time to listen for the “still small voice”  of  the Holy Spirit.

~Samuel Lawrence~

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A Call to Service

BarbaraThomasA Call to Service

By Barbara Thomas

“Integrity First”
“No One Comes Close”
“Semper Paratus – Always Ready”
“Honor, Courage, Commitment”
“Service Before Self”
“Peace through Strength”
“These Things We Do That Others May Live”
“The Impossible We Do Everyday The Miracles Take a Bit
Longer”
“Semper Fidelis – Always faithful”
“First in, Last out”
“Honor, Courage, Commitment”
“Not for self, but country”
“The other easy day was yesterday”
“Lead, Follow, or Get Out of the Way”
“In God we trust. All other we monitor”

The above phrases in quotes are more than words to some people; they are guides, creeds, mottos, inspirations, words to live by, and for some, to die by.  My workplace is somewhat special and different. Many of us here know that and appreciate that every day. We are built of a USMilitarySealspeople who have been brought together to accomplish big tasks. What many may not know is that we are in the midst of people, who by their sacrifice and service, have allowed us, as Americans, to pursue a life of freedom, choice, peace and prosperity. In my organization, our population is approximately 200 people and 15% of those individuals have truly served many of us and we, at times, fail to realize or acknowledge their sacrifice.

In our midst, we have lots of smart people, talented people, and creative people, but we also have people who have been servants and heroes. Among us we have individuals who have been involved in activities such as: The Cuban Missile Crisis: Parachuting into hostile territory; Piloting Patrol Boats in Vietnam; Sonar Technicians, Blue Angels Demonstration team member; Preparing and repairing service equipment; Navigating submarines, boats and missiles to their proper destination; Caring for those injured in battle; Protecting the United States’ land, air, and water borders. We have Bronze Star Recipients, Purple Heart Recipients, Commendation recipients and other medal award winners among us. The list can go on and should go on, but beyond our thanks and appreciation, our service men and women deserve our utmost respect and admiration. Thank You to those of you who have served our country and have helped to keep us free. God Bless America!

The following excerpt from a song basically says it all: “A man goes off to war, He’s not afraid to live or die for a people who don’t even know who he is….”


In Memoriam:

Captain Mark R. McDowell The above article was originally written in January 2009. We are reprinting here in honor and memory of Barbara and Bill Thomas’s son, Captain Mark R. McDowell, a member of the 336 Fighter Squadron based in Goldsboro,NC.  Captain McDowell was killed in action on July 17, 2009 in Afghanistan. He answered his country’s call, defending his country with his life.

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13)

Mark was born on June 3, 1983 in Charlotte, North Carolina.  Mark was a very smart and inquisitive little boy.  Once he entered school, he found his true love, learning.  Whatever Mark tackled, he tackled it with enthusiasm and gusto, striving to always be the best.  As a 2nd grader his teacher placed him at a table with students who were not quite as quick as Mark and Mark began tutoring others at that young age.  He continued in his role of helping others as he grew older, whether it was tutoring in math or science, helping with handicapped children, working in the youth legislature, leading prayer studies while attending the United States Air Force Academy, or more recently volunteering at the base hospital in Afghanistan.

Mark’s call to the Lord came at the age of 8 and since that time, the Lord was a mighty and constant force in Mark’s life.  As a teenager Mark tried to be an example to others and as he grew older he continued to lead his life to honor and please God.  While at the Air Force Academy, Mark was very active in the Officer’s Christian Fellowship where he decided to learn to play the guitar – just because they needed someone to.  That was Mark, always willing to step up, never Mark McDowellafraid to fail, always willing to trust God to lead him and show him where he could serve.  God gave Mark amazing talents and capabilities.  Mark’s wife Katie said of Mark –no matter what he tried to do – he worked hard and mastered it quickly. That is the way Mark was in his walk with God.  He attacked the scriptures with a desire to learn more about the Lord and to understand everything he could about the God that he loved and served.

Mark’s service required the ultimate sacrifice from him and he gave it freely.  Mark gave his life for a cause he believed in and he lived his life for the Master he so willingly worshipped and served.  Mark ran his race well and he ran his race to the fullest of his capabilities.  He is a child of God and now he resides with his Father above.  There is a saying that fits the way Mark lived, “Take care of your body as if you will live forever, Take care of your soul as if you will die tomorrow”.  That is the way Mark lived each and every day.

The following is what Mark chose to have written beside his graduation picture from the Air Force Academy in 2005.  While others were thanking family and friends, Mark left his classmates and Air Force comrades with the following scripture:

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.” (Hebrews 12:1)

The following is a poem written by Mark’s parents – Bill and Barbara Thomas

Tribute to a beloved son:

patriotic“We tied a yellow ribbon around our mailbox in May
It was to come down when we held you again one day
The ribbon still adorns our mailbox today
For to remove it requires strength for which we can only pray

You took your pledge to defend and fight
You left us with a smile that dark spring night
As you flew your jet to a far away land
We never suspected you would not fly home again

A flag stands in our window today
A reminder of a son so soon taken away
You have done us proud and given your all
In our hearts you will always live and stand so very tall.”

We miss you and love you,
Bill and Mom

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